Foodoscopes — March 2016

All illustrations by Erin Filson.

MARCH 2016



PISCES Feb 19 – March 20 —Happy Birthday, Fish Friends! The universe got you a beautiful solar eclipse to celebrate, and that means a boost of power and energy for your soul. Start new projects, pick up new hobbies, and take your health squarely into your own hands by making up your own diet of all the best things ever! Have shredded chicken barbecue tacos for breakfast and an avocado milkshake for lunch. Dine on cauliflower crusted pizza and spaghetti squash! Enjoy the spotlight responsibly, however. There’s a thin line between confidence and arrogance. You’re learning more and more about yourself every day, and it feels good to have the reins in your hands—you make the reservations, you pick the coffee shop, and YOU drive to the farmer’s market on weekends! And let’s face it, there is no birthday if there is no cake. Bake yourself something amazing and don’t share with anyone. Unless you’re one of those “generous” people, that is (Psst! You ARE, you’re a Pisces!).

This Month’s Treat: Heirloom carrot cake with triple-cream Brie frosting and candied ginger.


ARIES Mar 21 – Apr 19 — Let’s start this month off with a bang! Well, at least a solar eclipse. On March 9, look to the heavens while cleaning out that fridge in a big way—it’s a month of new beginnings, and you need to re-think just about everything you’re putting into your body. Stay away from self-criticism, though, and start fresh under the guise of maximizing your potential by maximizing your food intake! If you haven’t swapped vegetable oil out for organic, unrefined coconut oil yet, now’s the time. With proven health benefits (like reduction of protein-loss and a positive influence on heart health, weight loss, and immunity against viruses and bacteria) and a medium-high cooking heat, this delightfully bright oil in small quantities will change the way you eat everything, from pan-seared salmon to cookies. Just turn a deaf ear to any negative naysayers. In fact, avoid it altogether and treat yourself to a Solar Eclipse Solo Soiree—take yourself out to dinner at a local, farm-to-table hot spot, and definitely order dessert.

This Month’s Treat: Coconut oil popcorn with dark chocolate chips and shredded coconut.


TAURUS Apr 20 – May 20 —Change happens, and there’s only one thing you can do to get through it—survive! You’ll be forced to deal with some unpleasant things this month, and that pushes poor Taurus out of the comfort zone. No comfort zone means extra comfort food, so stock up on the makings for mashed potatoes, chicken soup, and whatever else wraps a fuzzy food blanket around your tumultuous tummy. Keep it in the kitchen, though! Avoid temptation to order take-out and make everything yourself. Bonus points for stress-relieving cooking time, since we all understand the healing that comes from cranking some tunes, dicing some veggies, and hearing the sizzle of olive oil in a sauté pan. When at work, March is your month for showing your leadership skills and showing good judgment – hit both out of the park by organizing a healthy, potluck luncheon with everyone bringing in a favorite dish or snack to share with the group. You’ll be a hero!

This Month’s Treat: Good ol‘ Ants on a Log, with organic raisins and almond butter.


GEMINI May 21 – June 20 —This month is a perfect time for a little self-evaluation, starting with reputation and status in your public life. What’s the last restaurant you ate at? What do you drink with dinner? What’s your go-to cheese to impress your friends at a get-together? If you’re less than proud of any of those answers, live March to the fullest and ask again next month. You’ll pass with flying collards, you flexible Gemini, you. Look out for a big boost of energy after the solar eclipse on the 9th! Take full advantage, and protein-load like there’s no tomorrow. Ditch desserts as you know them and replace with a banana-based smoothie with Greek yogurt and a scoop of peanut butter, or sub out your morning coffee with a cold-pressed juice full of greens and citrus. You’ll feel the boost of freshness, which should match your boost of creativity. Twin boosts! Imagine that.

This Month’s Treat: Epic Grilled Cheese with whole-grain bread, Gruyere, imported mustard, and local bacon.


CANCER June 21 – July 22 —We’re digging deep this month, folks, and your beliefs are under the microscope. No worries, though, because you can remain chill as ever even under the gun—think chill thoughts with an Italian gelato in hand and a great new pair of sunglasses! Have you ever considered the raw food movement? It’s more than just veggies. Carpaccio, tartare, and sashimi are the next adventure for you, and it doesn’t take much to believe in the health benefits of this delicious trend. Think about taking your ethics out for a spin, as well—how do you feel about vegetarians, vegans, pescatarians, and other morality-based food lifestyles? Have you done your research on raw cheese vs. pasteurized? Do you eat locally? Use your emotional powers to re-evaluate your food feelings, and enjoy the ride by trying everything! March is for breakthroughs. Onward, good Crab!

This Month’s Treat: Vegan Ceviche with oyster mushrooms, tomato, red onion, lime juice, avocado, cilantro, and jalapeño.


LEO July 23 – Aug 22 —March is a telltale month for the Lions and Lionesses of the universe, and the secret is following your fiery heart. Hot sauce, anyone? Find a new spicy condiment to flavor the month, and use it as a reminder to keep life well-stoked. This is no time for secrets! Let the world know your true flavors with a sweet social media campaign on your home-cooked meals (we know you’re a Lion in the zodiac, but a tiger in the kitchen). Use that classic creativity to dive deep into your spice cabinet, and emerge covered in deliciousness—cumin, herbs de provence, white pepper, and smoked paprika NEED to be explored by your talented palate. You won’t be sorry. But be wary of long-term consequences in this quest for herbal essence. Sriracha addiction is no joke.

This Month’s Treat: Chipotle “Put it on Everything” Sauce, mayo and Greek yogurt blended with cumin, dried dill, adobo chili peppers, lime juice, and sea salt.


VIRGO Aug 23 – Sept 22 —Communication makes the world Vir-go ’round! Consider this month’s total eclipse a chance for rebirth in disclosure, and pay close attention to how it all affects you. Learn from everything, try not to take it personally, and adjust accordingly. Seems simple enough, so keep your meals on the simple side for March by planning ahead—your meticulous attention to detail will be a huge help, and your grocery shopping trips can totally be streamlined for Virgo practicality. Start in the produce section, and fill your basket with as many veggies as you can. Add protein with cheese, of course, and grab crackers and jam for a month-long Emergency Cheese Pairing kit (or ECP kit), and finish with must-have dry goods like quinoa and pasta sauce. Also, use this renaissance of rapport to overcome any shyness by inviting new friends over for your healthy meals. Healthy foods make healthy relationships, eh?

This Month’s Treat: Warm Kale Salad with braised pears, goat cheese, and sunflower seeds with olive oil.


LIBRA Sept 23 – Oct 22 —Welcome to sweet, sweet March. You have a sweet tooth and we all know it, and your challenge this month is to lasso that offending tooth and brainwash it into savory submission. Now is the time for health and happiness, Libra, and the tools are simple to grasp. Squash cravings for candy and chocolate by popping grapes and indulging in daily clementines; you’ll get your fix without the guilty finish. Tap into your naturally romantic side by surprising loved ones with spontaneous picnics, complete with cheese and charcuterie plate and fresh pressed juices. Start a new fitness trend, like catching popcorn kernels thrown into the air or eating sushi with a blindfold. Just try and avoid indulging yourself too much—even peaceful Libra can get carried away.

This Month’s Treat: Chicken salad with grapes, walnuts, dried cranberries and celery.


SCORPIO Oct 23 – Nov 21 —March madness, indeed—time to crank out the fun! Hobbies and traditions are especially important to focus on this month, and it’s all fueled by the renewal of life essence that springs forth from the solar eclipse. Nourish your zest for life with a diet full of bright citrus, lemony goat cheeses, springy greens, and only the freshest seafood. For breakfast, try and include a great source of omega 3 fatty acids, like smoked salmon and egg yolks, and whip up a healthy smoothie with added chia or hemp seeds. You’re an exciting person, and it’s a good period in your life to strengthen relationships and bond with those close to you. There’s no better bonding that brunching together, so turn those breakfasts into social events! Ever built a Bloody Mary bar for friends, or hosted an omelette-making competition? Do it. Do it all, Scorpio!

This Month’s Treat: Homemade poppy seed bagels with lemon ricotta and fresh blueberries.


SAGITTARIUS Nov 22 – Dec 21 —Changing your home environment can change your attitude, and changing your attitude can change your life. March is for optimism, and you’re a happy expert in that department. Switch around your kitchen gadgets and add some homey touches like hilarious coffee mugs and illustrated tea towels—you won’t wanna leave your stove all day! Speaking of lovin’ that oven, bake anything and everything you can think of this month, from asparagus and Parmigiano on puff pastry to funfetti cupcakes with cream cheese frosting. Make sure to snap pictures of everything you make, too, because that Instagram account isn’t going to like itself. Focus on family right now, and build relationships over family-style meals and hand-me-down recipes. Take advantage of an extra burst of eclipse energy and make March work for YOU!

This Month’s Treat: Baked eggs in avocado halves with bacon jam and a toasted English muffin. 


CAPRICORN Dec 22 – Jan 19 —You are an info-maniac, a learning machine, and a knowledge maven. March is your oyster, and the way to crack it open is to arm yourself with the power of research. Hunt down the ingredients on everything you put in your pantry so you have total control of your diet, and perfect your go-to recipes be learning all the newest time-saving techniques. Are you holding your knives properly when you chop? What’s the best way to deglaze a pan? How many bananas can you eat for the proper amount of potassium without overdoing it? You will seek the answers, and be glad that you did. The impetus is strong this month to put things off, so inspire yourself to face them by rewarding each deed with an amazing snack. Try Taleggio with apple chutney or aged farmhouse cheddar with prosciutto and fig jam. Be tactful in your relationships, and you’ll be meeting new people this month so turn up the Capricorn charm!

This Month’s Treat: Flatbread pizzas with zucchini, fennel, sage, and Epoisses.


AQUARIUS Jan 20 – Feb 18 —March urges you on into 2016, begging you to indulge and be extravagant! Enjoy yourself responsibly, but keep an eye on those expenses. Pasta is your new go-to, but you can be a wizard with spices and sauces—that’s the kind of extravagance that you can’t afford NOT to exhibit. A quick blender hollandaise sauce can turn any breakfast into a gourmet brunch, with egg yolks, melted butter, lemon juice, and paprika. Cream sauce? Forgettaboutit. Perfecting that recipe will make anyone go wild. Don’t even get me started on marinara. Your marinara CAN bring all the boys to the yard! The solar eclipse on the 9th of March can ferry in some major inner strength, and honest Aquarius will use this to propel you to success. Renewal can also come in the form of a day of juice cleansing. Drink life in, my friend, and enjoy the rediscovery that this month brings.

This Month’s Treat: Traditional risotto with cream, thyme, and shaved black truffle.